Today's guest blogger, Ahyiana Angel has started a new blog called "Life According to Her". Great writer, along with with some great material. Give a read on a subject men and women both struggle with: phone privacy, temptation, and finding what you're looking for...
You have your suspicions and that phone of his is staring up at you
from the side table next to the bed. It’s practically screaming your
name vying to get your attention. You stare in its direction for far too
long then your good sense kicks in and you ask yourself, do I really want to snoop in his phone? This is where things can get tricky. You need to make sure that you
are real with yourself. The minute that you decide to sneak around and
riffle through your partner’s cell phone you are making a statement. You
don’t have trust in your relationship—at least not on your end. When you decide to embark on a search and seizure mission you have to
be emotionally prepared for what you may find.
One morning I went
looking and I found exactly what I was looking for, signs of deception.
Our relationship was rocky and admittedly on its last leg. I wanted it
to be right, but we had gone through so many ups and downs that I was
barely hanging on. He was running late for work and he’d left his gym
bag in the backseat of his car. I volunteered to grab it for him. As if a sign from the universe, on queue, as I slid into the driver
side the cell phone that I didn’t know was in his car chimed. Naturally I
picked it up from the center console. As I held this treasure of
information in my hand I looked at the screen. I couldn’t resist. It
was almost as though he wanted me to look through his phone because it
wasn’t locked! My palms were starting to sweat and I was petrified of
being found out but I scrolled fast and managed to speed read through
kinky message exchanges with “Veronica,” emails with some other chick
and the line that caught my attention and dropped my jaw, “I couldn’t do
it, I’m going to keep my baby.” Pause...baby??? On that note, I was done. I needed that final slap of
reality to make me walk. My mission was complete but I sat in a daze
with the doors closed and the windows rolled up on a warm sunny morning.
Sweat began to form on my face but my hands felt too numb to reach and
wipe the moisture away.
Out of the eerie silence there was a jarring tap on the window. My
heart thumped and the phone fell into my lap. I was scared to look in
the direction of the noise. I’m busted! Dang it! I tried to
channel my inner gangsta before turning to face him and his lies. I
closed my eyes, took a deep breath, and turned with rage. I was ready
for war. I flung the door open and almost knocked down this little old
lady in her moo moo. She’d hopped out of her dark blue Buick in the
hopes of having found a spot to move her car for street sweeping. I
frantically apologized and explained that I wasn’t leaving. I ran back
to the apartment to face my liar.
If you go looking, then you and your heart better be ready. So when
should you go looking through your partner’s phone? When you are ready to
walk away. If you find the evidence of an unfaithful partner, which is
what you were looking for, right? You better be ready to call it quits
in my opinion. If not, what are you searching for? If you are not ready
to take action then why put yourself through the torture of snooping,
finding something out, then getting upset and confronting your partner
only to end up right where you started…not trusting that person. Oh, and
I guarantee given what you learned the first time around, if you don’t
peace out, you will be snooping again real soon.
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