RELATIONSHIP LESSON: Never get stuck with something that ain't moving!
Today's lesson might not be the best thing for those in struggling relationships to hear, but then again, it just might be the very thing you need to read. We ALL get stuck, that's right I said it. The key is in not staying that way, so how do you do it? What is the best way to apply traction to a relationship in a standstill? You have to evaluate what isn't working as well as evaluate what does work. Ask yourself the following questions...
1) Are attempts to get better one sided, or are they equal? I don't care how many ways you attempt to get out of a rut, if both sides aren't working on it together, any fix made wont last long. A simple "how can I help make this better" can go a long way, and their answer could spark the involvement you need so it won't be so one sided.
2) Am I the match or am I the water? Some of the best made plans or ideas constructed by our partner can be either met by us with fire to consume it (yes baby lets do it), or by water to drown it (that's dumb, its not gonna work). What comes from of our own mouth can be the cause or the cure.
3) Can I actually do better by myself? The scales tip one way or the other in relationships, so when the scale goes in the wrong direction is it time to cash out? Most times people run away without asking and answering the other two questions first.
Anyone who doesn't make attempts to get un-stuck actually put the other person at risk as well. I didn't always like being stuck, and I learned lessons when I fell in my mud and wallowed in it like most pigs did. Treadmills have their purpose, but after a while all you're doing is running in place. Sometimes you need movement, a change of scenery, a different perspective before you get bored and hate the routine. Get un-stuck!
Today's lesson might not be the best thing for those in struggling relationships to hear, but then again, it just might be the very thing you need to read. We ALL get stuck, that's right I said it. The key is in not staying that way, so how do you do it? What is the best way to apply traction to a relationship in a standstill? You have to evaluate what isn't working as well as evaluate what does work. Ask yourself the following questions...
1) Are attempts to get better one sided, or are they equal? I don't care how many ways you attempt to get out of a rut, if both sides aren't working on it together, any fix made wont last long. A simple "how can I help make this better" can go a long way, and their answer could spark the involvement you need so it won't be so one sided.
2) Am I the match or am I the water? Some of the best made plans or ideas constructed by our partner can be either met by us with fire to consume it (yes baby lets do it), or by water to drown it (that's dumb, its not gonna work). What comes from of our own mouth can be the cause or the cure.
3) Can I actually do better by myself? The scales tip one way or the other in relationships, so when the scale goes in the wrong direction is it time to cash out? Most times people run away without asking and answering the other two questions first.
Anyone who doesn't make attempts to get un-stuck actually put the other person at risk as well. I didn't always like being stuck, and I learned lessons when I fell in my mud and wallowed in it like most pigs did. Treadmills have their purpose, but after a while all you're doing is running in place. Sometimes you need movement, a change of scenery, a different perspective before you get bored and hate the routine. Get un-stuck!
Very insightful blog. The points you gave were very helpful. keep up the great work!!!
ReplyDeleteGood stuff help us!
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