Who To Keep, and Who To Let Go

RELATIONSHIP LESSON: Thank God for the ones who walked away, because they're making room for the ones who won't...

It’s ok to cry, be depressed or upset about it for a minute but don’t stay there too long. Get up and go on with your life.

This is what I’ve learned in all these years I’ve been on this earth: if somebody wants to get up and walk out of your life, let...them...go! Especially if you know you’ve done everything you could do. You’ve sat around and been the best man or the best woman you could've been, and they still wanna go? Please, let...them...go! Whatever they’re running after, they’ll see what they had later, but by then it’ll be too late because half these people you’ve been sitting around crying about, in 2-3 years you won’t even remember their last name. How many times have you seen that one man or woman somewhere and you said, “what the hell was I thinking?!” I’ve been there, and thought to myself, “What was I going through? I must’ve been lonely as hell to hook up with you!”

Some people come into your life for a lifetime, and some come for a season, but you have to know which one is which. You’ll always mess up when you mix seasonal people up with lifetime expectations (I know this lesson all too well). I was one of those people that went and got married to someone I was only supposed to be with for a season. And I wondered why I had so much hell in my life? Don't look at my blog with that tone of voice, some of you have been there too!

Listen, I put everybody that comes into my life in the category of a tree. Some people, are like leaves on a tree. The wind blows, they’re over here. They’re unstable. The wind blows again, they over there. The weather changes, they wither up and die. They’re gone, and that’s alright. Most people in the world are like that, and they’re just there to take from the tree. That’s all they do, take from the tree and give shade every now and again. But don’t get mad at people like that, that’s just who they are, and they’ll never be anything but a leaf. That’s what they were put on this earth to be – a leaf. Some people, are like a branch on that tree. You gotta be careful with branches because they’ll fool you. They’ll get there and make you think they’re a good friend and that they’re strong, but the minute you step out there on them? They’ll break and leave you high and dry. But if you find you two or three people in your life that are like the roots at the bottom of that tree? Consider yourself truly blessed, because these are the kind of people that aren’t going ANYWHERE. If those roots weren’t there, that tree couldn’t live. You understand? A tree can have a hundred million branches, but only a few roots down at the bottom to make sure it gets everything it needs. I’m telling you, when you get you some roots, hold on to them. The rest of them? Just let them go, let folks go!

Nobody said its going to be easy, but it’ll get easier when you learn how to love yourself. You will make a decision when you get to a point in your life and you look at them and go, “okay, wait a minute. You? Or me?” What I've learned to do is tell them, “look here, this thing you’re doing right here? That is going to cause a problem – you need to fix that. If we're going to be friends, you have to fix that. If you don’t, then we're gonna have an issue.” Now if you see someone fix that, or if they're trying to fix that, you have someone who cares so keep them around. That is a leaf trying to grow up and be something else, you understand? But if you tell somebody that what they’re doing is hurting and they need to stop it, and they keep doing it? They don’t care about you or the relationship, move on, let them go. No matter how much it hurts, let them go. It will get easier, I promise you it will . Everyday it'll get easier and easier and easier, you just have to make it through...

 

*thank you Tyler Perry and T.D. Jakes