So as you read this, do so believing that anyone who has hurt you has finally realized how much they have hurt you. It really does not matter if they ever realize their mistakes. What matters most is that you realize that no matter how much they hurt you, they do not deserve the power of preventing you form having the type of love and relationship you desire.
As promised, here is the letter and explanation you should have received a long time ago.
Dear ____________, 
I am writing to you today to ask for your forgiveness. I now  understand how much I hurt you and how much pain I caused you.  This is  not easy for me to admit because doing so causes me pain.  For it was  never my intention to hurt you. I am not going to make excuses for my  behavior. For one time I am going to step up to the plate and take  responsibility for my actions.
I now see that pointing fingers and blaming you was the coward’s  way out. I could have communicated like a man, but I took the easy way  out...the path of least resistance.  And although that path was easy for  me, I now see how much it hurt and affected you. And for that I am truly  sorry.
I also want to apologize for every time that I did not live up to  and honor my commitment with you.  I now see that every time I lied,  every time I cheated, every time I put you down and blamed you I was  doing what was best for me without taking into consideration how it was  going to affect you. It was very selfish of me and I’m sorry. Instead of  talking to you and communicating how I was feeling I ran away, like a  little boy, too afraid to speak the truth.
You deserved to be treated with love and respect and I failed. I  am no longer willing to be the victim and blame everyone and everything  for my mistakes and shortcomings. I will no longer try to blame and make  you wrong for things that were my fault. I now see that I and I alone  was responsible for the emotional pain and devastation I have caused  you.
But what bothers me the most is that my mistakes have caused you  to put up walls and close yourself off to the world. My actions are  depriving someone else of the opportunity to know what a beautiful and  loving person you are.  The pain I have caused has scarred your  heart so bad that you are no longer willing to open up and take the  chance on love.
So I am asking you to please put down your walls. I do not  deserve the ability and power to take that away from you. I am simply  someone who has made some mistakes because I was dealing with my own  shortcomings and faults. Unfortunately you became the victim of my  problems.
 Instead of being a man and dealing with my stuff, I ran from it and even worse, I projected it onto you.
If I could go back in time and erase the things I did which  caused you pain, I would do it in a heartbeat, but I can’t. I can only sit  here and do one thing, something I should have done a long time ago; say  I was wrong and I am sorry.
In closing I want to say that I understand that you will probably never forget the hurt and pain I have caused you and those close to you. I don’t expect you to. But I hope you will find it in your heart to forgive me, not for me, but for you. For I now see and understand the ramifications of my choices and decisions.
I ask you to forgive me so you can free yourself form the  shackles that have imprisoned your heart and kept you from experiencing  the love you deserve. I wish you nothing but life’s blessings.
 
Sincerely,
_________________________
 
I am  sorry that you never received an apology or an explanation when you  deserved it. But now that you have this one, I pray you can be free to move on and leave the  past where it deserves to be. The only question is, will you?
_________________________

That was so beautiful.
ReplyDeleteWOW... so wonderfully written. Thank you. :)
ReplyDeleteYou get it, thank you. Still men move on easier to a new woman (like you have apparently) for women it's much harder to just move on but thank you for this. Hopefully it will heal some of us.
ReplyDeleteI don't get it enough, but I understand it a little better now than I thought I did before.
ReplyDeleteBeautiful! & well said ....but this is from a man that has grown into a man....sadly most of you (men/boys) have not grown to this level yet....but thank you for the thought of one day letting down this wall and allowing love to enter again. Until then I /we can only wonder & wait!!!
ReplyDeleteSTILL WAITING ON LOVE.........
Beautiful! & well said ....but this is from a man that has grown into a man....sadly most of you (men/boys) have not grown to this level yet....but thank you for the thought of one day letting down this wall and allowing love to enter again. Until then I /we can only wonder & wait!!!
ReplyDeleteSTILL WAITING ON LOVE.........
Watch it happen when you least expect it!
ReplyDelete