Affirmation Works When You Work It!

Can I be honest with you? Of the five love languages out there, words of affirmation is the one that makes my engine RUN! If I'm bringing in the groceries, and the right one tells me how they love when I carry those bags in from the car...I'm loading up every bag I can, and even holding a couple of them with my teeth. When I'm cutting the grass, and the right one says to me how she appreciates me keeping the home looking good...I'll change my name to "The Sodfather" and make that yard look like the Garden of Eden. I'm saying all of this because when Father's Day came yesterday, men can feel like they are doing the best they can, but when the right one says to them how much they are appreciated for being there and showing a great example of a man...men feel like they're on top of the world. The key in this lesson so far is "THE RIGHT ONE", so remember that as I continue.

My weekend didn't start out so good, as I was in my house suffering from summer allergies when I got a call from Jonathan asking if I was home. "Uh, yeah" I said. "Well, can we come over?" he asked, and as I held back several sneezes during this conversation, I told him that it was ok. As soon as they came, Jonathan gives me a Superman gift bag (I love everything Superman related), hugs me (I love a un-solicted hug from my son) and says "Happy Father's Day Daddy!" I open the bag and I pull out a t-shirt that says SUPERDAD with the logo in the middle of the shirt. LaShaun says to me "it's because we believe you are a super Dad." AFFIRMATION!!! At this point, my allergy filled watery eyes had a few tears in it too, but I had to play it off like a G because I was starting to get a little emotional.

The next day I'm up checking Facebook like its the morning paper, looking at all of the words of affirmation women are giving their men for Father's Day when I came across one post to me from LaShaun (what???) and I couldn't take it anymore because LaShaun in no way considers herself a social media person. My affirmation levels were going through the roof again! I felt like I was a King on Father's Day because "THE RIGHT ONE" was giving me words of life, even though I've tried and failed on SEVERAL occasions and our relationship wasn't always the best. I remember the times we fought over parenting after the divorce, I remember the time I was arrested at her home over a brewing argument, I remember all too well just how much of a genuine bastard I was and they both suffered because of it. You see, I never want it said that my life is all squeaky clean...IT HASN'T BEEN! I'm first to admit my shortcomings, so when others feel they need to, it doesn't effect me. I live my life with the consequences of my poor choices, and the hurdles and hoops I jump over and through are high, but if you never learn the lessons from your mistakes...you're doomed to stay in the skin you're in. I made up my mind I wasn't going to stay there in my old self, and I'm living proof that after 13 years God can change anybody! God has given me words of affirmation and it has literally changed my life. So much so that when Jonathan and LaShaun feed my emotional man with affirmation, just like the groceries and the lawn, I want to go above and beyond for them because they appreciate me...just like any father would after Father's Day.

facebook.com/RelationshipLessons
twitter.com/RShipLessons

This Friday night, I will be a part of an amazing panel talking about dating, sex and relationships with Crystal and Ally from "7 Minutes with God" at Cafe Say in Chicago. If you're in the area, you might want to come on out for some real relationship talk. See you then!