Wednesday, June 26, 2013

Pursuing vs Being Pursued (Guest Blogger)

I've been really fortunate to have some great writers send me their view on relationships, and where they are in their process of finding the right relationship. Today is no different when it comes to great writers. I've been after this one for a while since she launched her own blog not that long ago called "Lips for Jesus: Hues & Hallelujahs". Don't let the name fool you, she has some of the best work I've seen in a while, so check her out at lipsforjesus.blogspot.com or facebook.com/lipsforjesus. So without any further ado, let me introduce you to Brandi Williams.  

A few months ago I made several attempts to reach out to a guy that I used to kick it with back some years ago.  I’ve experienced a lot of life changes since that time, one being my growth in relationship with Christ, and from what I could see, this brother was now walking with the Lord as well.  “Hmmm… could we kick it?” I wondered. I was naturally curious and was certainly trying to see what was up with him, or so I thought…
You see, in my past I’ve always went after men, full assertive, bar none!  Well, in this instance, every attempt I made failed. It didn’t just fail...it failed miserably, sheesh! The Lord straight shut me down…all the way down, and with no dispute of clarity I heard Him say “No.”  No???  I accepted the “no” but I certainly felt some kind of way about it! I felt like I wasn’t in control. It made me feel like I had no say so in who I would eventually join in life partnership. It made me feel like I would never get what I deeply desire.  A husband…a family…

These sentiments did not last long because my actual thoughts and beliefs are quite the contrary.  However, I did journey into a place where I realized that the Lord of my life really does call me (and you too) to lay EVERYTHING down for His way and His timing (sigh…a very long, exasperated sigh…).  
So what was the issue here?  It wasn’t surrendering to God’s authority in my life.  It wasn’t that I didn’t believe His word to be true in that if I delight myself in Him, He’ll give me the desires of my heart (the desires He gives me, of course).  BUT the big, fat, freaking, underlying issue here was the matter of pursing vs. being pursued. What does it look like to be pursued?  Hell, I don’t know, I’ve never experienced it. BUT,  I want to and I will!
Here is why:
  • The difference between now and then is that I know I’m worth being pursued.
  • The difference between now and then is that I REFUSE to chase a man! I won’t have to chase the gift of a man the Lord gives to me.
  • The difference between now and then is that I accept God’s way, timing, plan, and purpose for my life.
So what now? I don’t always know and honestly I feel challenged in this area of my life. I can certainly tell you that none of the above lets me off the hook in terms of presenting myself as open, available, or approachable to men. When I’m in the room, the building, wherever, there’s no denying it. I may not be chasing a man, but I will get in a man’s way. After all, WWRD?  What would Ruth do? (*Kanye shrug*) LOL!

If you would like to be featured on the blog, feel free to email your take on love and relationships to relationshiplessons2013@gmail.com and you too can hold class for everyone to read your material... 

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