Tuesday, January 26, 2016

It's Not About The Lack Of Money (It Is, But It Isn't)


Fellas, give me a minute to write this reality check…

It’s easy to blame women for not liking you because of the lack of money, instead of taking a look at yourself and realizing you haven’t done anything significant for anyone to admire. It's hard for women to like you when you don’t even like yourself. Money won’t fix this problem. Being single, broke, unhealthy and negative are just symptoms of your lack of professionalism and ambition in life; everything you don’t have is a result of your self-defeating attitude.

It never changes; whenever there is an article about how to get into a relationship, just like clockwork, the insecure trolls will come out of the woodwork to cast their negative shadow. “You need money to attract women!” is the mantra they chant. They fail to attribute their own failures to themselves. The guy who screams "you need money to attract women" have a lot less going for them than just being single; they're also broke. You’re basically advertising to the world on social media, “Hey, look at me! I’m single and broke; pity me!” Like Mr. T. would say, “I pity the fool”, but why don’t you work on your finances bro?

For the guy who complains that they need muscles to attract women, why aren’t you in the gym? If you don’t have money, why aren’t you learning how to make it? If you can’t find a great woman, why aren’t you working on your social skills? These factors are completely within your control. The reality is, it’s a lack of confidence, experience and a surplus of negative attitude that are the real reasons why women don’t like you. Your lack of finances, fitness and ambition are just icing on the cake. Yeah, you’re a real catch.

We can make more money; we can work out and eat properly, and we can meet people and develop our social skills, but for the self-proclaimed experts of trolldom, it’s much less painful just to blame other people. You don’t need money or muscles to attract women, but why wouldn’t you work on those things for yourself? Your health is measured in multiple ways, and if you have a lack in any area of your life, then it’s a good bet that you have major thinking barriers holding you back. Basically, it’s all a state of mind. There is a cure; start by opening your eyes and being honest with yourself for the first time in your life. Take responsibility for everything that is in or isn't in your life. Yes, even your environment; if you’re in a bad environment and haven’t taken action to get out, it’s your fault. It’s 100 percent guaranteed that you’re surrounded by other negative underachievers. Drop them, and you might start meeting some awesome people.

During the darkest times of my life, I couldn’t understand why I wasn’t able to meet good people. I was in an emotionally abusive relationship, and I had some pretty crappy friends, but it wasn’t their fault. The fact remained that I was insecure, negative, lacked ambition and had no real social skills. That’s what was holding me back. My results were in direct proportion to my level of thinking. I got stuck with these people because I was on their level; I was one of them, and I was happy being less than what I knew I could be. Maybe I could have complained that the world sucked, but I decided to change my own world instead.

You can be stuck and cry about how the world is wrong and continue to be unhappy, or you can design your life, pick up the slack and become amazing. Great women and friends will soon follow after a major attitude adjustment, and maybe some money might come your way too.

Okay, rant over…

Tuesday, January 19, 2016

How To Be A Valentine In January



Valentine’s Day seems to be next on everyone’s romantic radar. Television commercials, businesses, and nearly everyone else as a result are starting to wheel out the hearts and the roses. To me, it’s still closer to New Year’s Day than it is to Valentine's Day but it got me thinking. How have you treated that special someone in your life up to this point? Have you made them feel special? Have you been a friend through thick and thin? Have you been a lover like no other? Maybe it’s time to look at the past few weeks of January through the lens of Valentine’s Day to see how you should treat that special someone in the weeks to come.

Have you made that special someone feel “special” since they received that title? Have you gone shopping with them to improve their look and boost the way they feel about themselves? Have you encouraged them to travel or experience new things? Have you treated them to a dinner or something equally as nice, maybe bought them a little something you know they’ll love? It doesn’t take much to make someone feel special, a kind word here, a pat on the back there, or to just reach out and tell them how proud you are of the things they have done. This person is special to you; they will be in your life for a while to come, so go out of your way for them and make them see just how special they are.

How have you been a friend to this special someone? Do they feel as though they know you will always be beside them? No matter how down they are, you’ll be there showing them the sunlight on cloudy days. No matter how happy they are, you will remember this event for them and always have those stories on hand. Are you the voice that says one more hamstring curl, the whisper that says go ahead and have that cake, the chuckle that says I can’t believe we are about to do this? Can you be the voice they listen to that encourages them to find their own voice? It doesn’t take much to make a friend feel special, a word of encouragement here, a memory there, and an honest appraisal that they are important and they matter. This person is special to you; they will be in your life for a while to come, so go out of your way and make sure they know just how much of a friend you are.

Have you been a lover to this special someone? Do they feel like you are the cornerstone of their life? Have you shown them how much you love them in thought, word and deed every single day? Have you been that pillar of strength in times of need? Have you let them cry on your shoulder when life has been unfair? Have you shown that special someone that life without them is dull and gray, that the day is never truly bright until they arrive? Can you be the person they trust unconditionally, can you be the person they know they can count on no matter what, can you be the person they love most and love them back because they are worthy of that love? This person is special to you; they will be in your life for a while to come, so go out of your way and show them in thought, words and deeds, just how special this love is.

Here is something for you to think about: You should be the most important person in your own life. If you don’t consider yourself special, why would the world consider you special? How can you treat another person special if you don’t consider them equally as special as you? That mindset puts them on a pedestal and puts you beneath them, when you both should be equals. If you can’t be your own best friend, then how can you be a friend to anyone else? If you can’t love yourself, then how is someone else supposed to love you? If you don’t consider yourself worthy of love, you will eventually reject the love that is given to you.

You should always be that special someone in your life first. You were there when you were born, you will be there until you die, and you know your greatest achievements and your deepest fears. How are you treating this special someone? How are you treating yourself? Treat yourself as someone special because you will never know anyone else like you know yourself. Don’t neglect yourself, don’t lower yourself, and don’t put yourself down. When you treat yourself as special, it shines for the rest of the world to see, especially to the one you want to eventually see as special for you... 

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