Today's guest blogger coming to the worldwide Relationship Lessons stage is Vincent Taylor Alton from Toronto, Canada, and he submitted his lesson to me and I shared with a few people before publishing it. We all came away believing the timing of love is not like anything else out there. It just might be that "Love's #1 Fan" could have a little competition for that title after all...
If you were to tell me ten years ago, or even 6 months ago that I would be madly in love with the girl that I am with now, I would never have believed you. I would have told you that you were crazy. But love doesn’t always happen the way we imagine it. Although our first date was good, the next few months were not. We were very far apart in our understanding of each other and had allowed our reservations and assumptions to ruin things. Both of us were scared of the idea of a relationship; we were quick to judge each other and came to preconceived conclusions about the potentiality of the relationship. Relationships can be finicky at the start, there’s a lot of room for error. Attraction can quickly subside and it’s easy to give up when difficulties arise.
Around this time I remember feeling the need to make
a decision of whether to end it or invest in it whole-heartedly before
giving up. My insecurities aside, the fact I’m writing this obviously
means I chose to throw caution to the wind, and I’m glad that I did. If you
can work through the difficulties, they will bring you closer together
and help formulate a deeper understanding of each other. I believe this
was the case for us. As we came out of the woods, everything became much
better.
Recently we were sitting on a bench seat at a restaurant, and her hand was
rubbing my lower back. In that moment I realized I could see myself with
her for a long time. She was someone I wanted to be with and take a
chance on. It wasn’t gravitation that was responsible for me falling in
love, and in the moment I wasn’t sure what it was. Ah, love doesn’t need
to make sense...does it? Sometimes it involves merely uncorking the
imagination and bottling the common sense.
I couldn’t be happier with where we are in our relationship; it’s
scary, yet exciting.
I thoroughly enjoy spending time with her and
trying new things. For example, she recently took me to my first
baseball game! She looked absolutely stunning in her short heels, dark
jeans, a light blue jacket with a loose hanging white shirt underneath
and baseball hat I had just bought her. In that moment, it was as if she
and I were the only ones in the stadium, I felt like I had fallen in
love with her all over again.
I don’t know what the future holds, and that’s okay. Love is about
committing yourself with no guarantees. At the time, Thanksgiving was coming up and
I was thankful for every moment we shared. I feel most alive these days
and I don’t really know whether my elation comes from the qualities
that I love in her, or from how she makes me feel. Whether the glow that
surrounds her comes from me, comes from her, or comes from us together.
Love never happens the way we seem to think it does. Love is a
continuous journey filled with all kinds of experiences, there will be
great times and hard times; don’t expect it to be easy. In the joyous
mess that is life, it’s obvious the journey is not meant to be done alone.
May you find someone to love and do life with.
I know whom and what I have with her is special, and I cherish it very much.
I look forward to falling in love with her again and again.
Well...there you have it, love from the male perspective. It doesn't always come the way you expect it, but it always comes exactly the way you need it. Well done Vincent, well done indeed!
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