The Past is The Past

CONFESSION TIME: The consequences of my past and my past alone has haunted me for quite a while now. Meditating and doing stuff to avoid these thoughts hasn’t helped them to cease. Every event that I’ve encountered has repeated itself in my mind. I’m constantly reminded of how messed up I was. My immaturity dictated my decisions thus causing me to really bring myself down. I wasn’t aware of my surroundings or aware of how it would affect me in the long run – I wasn’t thinking thoroughly. I sometimes thought because of my decisions, I put myself here, and I really believe that. I had to be humbled, but had I not been who I was then, I wouldn’t be where I am now. I’ve been freed mentally. Though my days are tough and emotionally draining, I now think rationally and responsibly. I am not who I was 5, 10, or even 15 years ago...and neither are you.

We've all made bad decisions in our years of living, yet we have been blessed to learn from them. We've been given the opportunity to share our past confidently to others as means to guide and motivate – such as our parents. They have pressed us to be better, do better, and make better decisions because they weren’t able to. Sometimes we miss the signs, which is okay because if we wake up the next day, we’re given another sign to start over or change. We've gone through the past to get here and go further to what is promised to us. We're all uniquely made, and given different assignments to direct us to becoming stronger and better.

Though we reminisce on how we used to be or used to act, we don’t have to dwell on it. No one can go back and change something because we wouldn’t have been able to learn. If we were granted one wish to change something in the past, we wouldn’t be where we are now — emotionally or physically. There is a lesson in every season ranging from romances, friendships, relationships and even ourselves. We are all given the opportunity to spend more time with ourselves for gain and acceptance. As we learn more about how strong we are, how lovable we are, how caring, giving and beautiful are, we understand what we need now rather than tripping over what we wanted then. We become mature with age and experiences that includes bad and good decisions. What we did then shouldn’t affect who we are now. What’s done is done and there is more to come, but some situations are repeated as a test. Since we’ve grown so much, we should be able to know how to handle things better. So like I’ve told myself, I don’t live in my past anymore. We are new, the day is new and the challenge is new. Spend more time focusing on being better than yesterday and the 5, 10, 15 years before that…

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