1. To Feel Loved - When women feel loved, they relax and open to us. The
arguments dissipate, the sex is abundant, and their nurturing feminine
energy flows throughout our lives. Not feeling loved is the subtext of every argument that you and your partner have. If she is unhappy that you are going out with your friends,
or she’s upset about her day at work, or she is only responding to you
with brief snippets of sentences, then the cause is most likely her not
feeling loved enough. Learn to see through her words, actions and moods, and see what the real root of it is.
2. To Feel Safe - There is a war being waged on women’s self-esteem, sexuality and safety from a very young age. Because of the barrage of disempowering messages being sent
to women regarding their sexuality, women need to have a safe space
where they feel that they can trust their partners. She wants to trust your strength. She wants to feel like you can handle whatever she shows you. She wants to feel like you will not judge her if she asks
for something risqué. She wants to know you won’t collapse in defeat if
she tells you to do it “this way” instead. By creating a safe space for your woman to open up to you
emotionally and sexually, you will be giving her a very powerful gift and
you will allow her to grow within your relationship and undo old emotional
damage.
3. To Feel Seen - Women want to feel seen. She wants to feel you hearing her, and being aware of her emotional state. She doesn’t necessarily want you to be affected by her emotional state, but she does want you to be witness to it. If she is sitting across the room from you and you aren’t
picking up on the fact that she is suffering emotionally and on the
verge of tears, she will begin to trust you less. She will think, “if he
can’t see that I am hurting now, how long will it take him to figure it
out? Will I be suffering for days or weeks before he is aware of it or
cares enough to help me through this? I guess I have to rely on myself
for my own emotional support.” Life can seem extremely lonely, even within a relationship.
You have to constantly show your partner that at least one person will
be witness to her and her journey through life.
4. To Be Allowed To Be Nurturing - Just as masculine energy has the need to protect, feminine energy has the desire to nurture. Women want to see the cracks in our armour. They want to
see that we trust them enough to open up to them. They want to be able
to help us through our sadness. An integrated, evolved man who has a balanced masculine
energy as well as his own sliver of feminine would welcome his woman’s
nurturing. If you are a guy reading this, have you ever held open a
door for a woman because it’s the polite thing to do and she
chews your ear off for it? “Oh what? I can’t open the door for myself
because I’m a woman?! You sexist pig!” That is an example of a wounded, unbalanced woman who
doesn’t want to accept help from a masculine source. This is exactly how
it feels to your partner when you push her away when you feel the most
vulnerable. “I don’t need to lay my head down on your chest and tell you
about my feelings because I don’t have any!” That is a lie. It’s a lie
that serves your purpose of not letting your partner in. This lack of
vulnerability and authenticity is what is making you and your partner
suffer. Let her in, she wants to love you.
5. To Be Appreciated - The feminine in all people responds primarily to praise and appreciation. Remind your partner that you love her. Tell her that you appreciate what she brings to your life. Show her how much she means to you. The fastest way to run your relationship into the ground is
by ignoring your partner and taking her for granted. Appreciation is
the opposite of those things. Appreciation is the embodying this
mindset: “I am aware of what you bring to my life, and I want you to be
sure that I am aware of it as well.” So tell her what you appreciate, and tell her often.
6. To Feel Like She Can Count On You- Life gets pretty messy sometimes. When life’s unavoidable difficulties arise, do you fall apart under pressure or are you able to bend and not break? Women want to know that we can handle ourselves when life
happens. They want to know that we won’t run and hide when they get a
bit ‘too emotional’ for our liking. They want to know that they can
count on us. When you tell your partner you’ll do something, and then
you don’t do it, it hurts her. She loses a piece of trust in you that
has to be earned back. Even seemingly small things break that trust like
you saying that you will wash the dishes shortly after dinner, but
washing them the next morning instead. When enough small transgressions like this are sprinkled throughout your relationship, she will distrust you. Do what you say you will do, be who you say you are, and be consistent in your actions.
What Do Women Want In A Relationship? Women want partners that care. Women don’t want perfect partners; they want men who are striving to be their best selves. She doesn’t necessarily want someone who has every step of
his life pre-planned, but she wants someone with drive and with goals. She doesn’t necessarily want someone who cries every day,
but she does want someone who has the courage to cry in front of her
when he needs to. She doesn’t necessarily want someone who stays in therapy for his entire life, but she does want someone who has the courage to face his own emotional demons.
So put in the work. End the stalemate. Decide that you want
to be in the kind of relationship that most people don’t have, and you
want to put in the effort necessary to become that kind of man. The women of the world are waiting for us. And they want us to step up just as badly as we want them to open up...
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