Last week I wrote about annoying Facebook relationship statuses, and there is one in particular I want to go into even more depth on today. There appears to be a disconnect between men and women. I know…I’m
not breaking any news with that statement, but I’m noticing a trend
among women that I feel should be addressed. Far too often, I’ll come
across a woman that will post their "I’m Single And I Want to be in a Relationship" resumé online. This resumé will usually look like this:
- I have a college degree
- My own money
- My own apartment
- My own car
- (insert any other ego boosting accomplishment here)
This is then followed by the all too famous: “What do you have to offer me?”
I can’t help but laugh when I see and hear these things from
“successful” women because these things will NOT make a man want you,
chase you, stay with you, or do anything else for that matter. These things make YOU feel good,
but they do nothing for men. Do we appreciate your hard work and the fact
that you’ve been able to become a successful and self-sufficient adult?
Absolutely. It takes hard work, dedication, resilience and ambition to
achieve the accomplishments listed on your resumé.
Sorry I have to be the one to break it to you, but men don’t put that much emphasis
on that as you do. The constant need to brag about those things
actually makes us look at you as superficial. Pardon me if this comes
off as selfish, but what do those things do for men? I can’t make love
to your degree. You have a car? Great, I have one as well. You have your
own place? That’s nice, so do I. To the ladies that place so much value
on these things, I encourage you to also think about the
qualities men love women to have that actually hit home for us — that
is, if you want to have a relationship. Essentials that may
actually land you a man and not just a guy looking to crash at your
spot, waste the gas in your car, or drool over the accomplishments that
you have that he only dreams of ever attaining.
1. Be supportive. There’s nothing a man wants more
from his woman, than her support. Whether it’s support of our career
aspirations, the daily struggle of being a man living in America,
or help around the house. Be our partner. Support us in our visions and
through our ups and downs.
2. Trust us. We know all too well that your past may
have been one you wish to forget. We know you may suffer from selective
perception and sometimes you can’t help but have doubts when we say
we’re going to hang out with the fellas, or we’re working late. Try your
hardest to trust us anyway. We work very hard to be the best men we can
be, but you can’t imagine how comforting it is to know that our woman
trusts us.
3. Have personality. We want to be able to have fun
with you. Let’s play, joke around, and have a good time. What’s
interesting about what you find interesting? Tell us! Bring us into your
world and don’t bore us in the process. Your degree is a great
accomplishment, but what’s even greater is what you plan to do with it.
Share that with us. Having your own apartment is great — no roommates to
interfere with us — but show us how eclectic you are by the way you
decorate it.
Below is a list of things you may want to put on your next "Attention, I need a New Man" social media resumé post:
- I’m Patient
- I’m Nurturing
- I’m Supportive
- I’m Willing to Serve You
- I’m Down to Earth/Playful
The list can go on and on about what men REALLY care about when it
comes to being in a relationship with a good woman. Whether it’s
respecting the routine of Football Sunday, rubbing our back after a hard
day at work, giving us time to unwind with the fellas, not letting your
insecurity get the best of you, and even letting an argument die and
not trying to bring it back to life a week later…these things have value
that is deeply felt. I can assure you that the car you drive, house you
live in, and career you have will not keep us, or get us to become
interested. We want to know that we can build with you, that you’re
emotionally mature, and you’re not crazy and deranged. How do you
improve our life experience? Would we want our daughter to be like you?
Consider those academic and professional accomplishments to be icing on
the cake. We’re proud of you for them; but a loving, supportive, classy,
and humorous woman is what you should be posting on your social media
network resumé when trying to get the attention of a man. I understand
some of you ladies may only be able to live on the surface, but some of
us gentlemen would rather go deep. Open up, let us dive in and drown in
you. But who are you?
facebook.com/relationshiplessons
twitter.com/DelvinRestored
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