Right Here, Right Now!

This blog isn’t going to be a long one, but I’m hoping it moves you enough to start taking action this week. I see so many people “limping” through life, rather than bursting into every day full of life and passion. So here we go…

I want you to get out of your head and stop thinking about the future all of the time. Instead, I want you to concentrate more on the moment you’re in, and start taking chances right now. The present is all we have. That’s right, none of us are promised a tomorrow. How many times do you hear of someone who went to the doctor because they weren’t feeling great, and a couple of weeks later they’re no longer around because they had something terminal they didn’t know about? How many times have you heard of people who went out to grab something to eat and never made it home again?

So many of us spend all our time focused on planning for tomorrow, and there is nothing wrong with that, but too many people find out too late that tomorrow doesn’t always come. It is time to spend more time in the present and less time in the future. All we have is today, and to live an amazing future you have to live an amazing today. Sure, maybe you are scared of people hurting you, but if you spend your whole life looking for perfection, you’re missing all those amazing lessons the “imperfect ones” could be teaching you. It’s the same with anything we do in life. So here is my challenge for you today.

I want you to make a list of five things you’ve been meaning to do, or want to do but have been putting off. I want you to put them in order from the most important to the least important. Then every single day, I want you to do at least one thing that moves you closer toward one of those goals. It doesn’t have to be a huge action, but it needs to be some form of action. Keep it nice and simple.

For example, it could be asking for a pay raise at work, it could be going over and talking to a guy you find really attractive, it could be asking that woman (yes, that woman) out for a date. It doesn’t matter what you do, but the momentum you gather from taking small simple actions every day, adds up quickly. You’ll be amazed how good it feels when you start to feel yourself moving forward. I want you to start living your life today, because today is all we have.

Every morning when we wake up, there is no guarantee that we will make it back into bed at the end of the day. It sounds horrible, but it’s a fact of life. It’s time for you to take a more active role in your happiness. It’s time to get out of your head, and it’s time to start living in the present. I've said it a bunch of times in this blog, but stop focusing so much on tomorrow, and start paying more attention to today. You’ll be amazed how many of your goals you can achieve when you make this simple switch in your mindset...

Saying I Love You First

A lot of people celebrate the anniversary of their first date, their major relationship milestones and especially their wedding day, but I really think relationships begin with the first “I love you.” It solidifies that you two are having more than just fun. At that point, you’re in a relationship. I once read a survey showing that 76 percent of serious relationships started with the man saying “I love you” first. While this might come as a shock to those who think that men aren’t as emotionally demonstrative in relationships, it makes total sense to me. Men should be the ones to say “I love you” first, and here is why...

We’re born to do it - I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again many more times in the future. Men are hunters. We need to go out and get what we want. Most of us are not born to be passive recipients. Saying “I love you” is a step in a relationship, just like a first date or a first kiss. Men want to be the ones to take that step first. Do I think men should be the initiators because women can’t do these things? Absolutely not, but I do think women initiating upsets the natural order of things and makes it tougher on the relationship. Saying “I love you” is a new chapter of a relationship, and men should be the one to turn the pages in the book of love.

It shows our commitment - Saying “I love you” is an undeniable commitment. It’s taking a giant leap forward in the relationship. When we say those three words to you first, it indicates that we want to take that step forward with you. In an age when "male commitment-phobia" runs rampant, that first “I love you” is a nice sign from your partner, showing that he's in your relationship for the right reasons.

It gives us one last chase - Like I said above, men are hunters by nature, and we also love the chase by nature. Men saying “I love you” first gives you a little power and him a little room to chase you, as long as you don’t say it back right away. Those few minutes, hours, days or weeks you wait between receiving the initial “I love you” and giving your own are a delicate dance. Your man is waiting for you to say something back. Of course, you should do what is natural to you and say “I love you” as you feel it. Don’t hold out just for the sake of holding out, but know that after you have sex for the first time, there aren’t many chases left in a relationship, so savor it. 

Let’s do a quick poll in the comments. Ladies, did you say “I love you” first, or did your guy say it first? Feel free to share what happened in your case with me...